Line & Length
R Mohan
Sydney Test spawns series of fan awards
January 10, 2008
The Sydney Test, the first to be played in the New Year, is proving to be a bonanza for mobile phone operators. Their communication systems are flooded with jokes about the new firm of Benson & Bucknor, so famous now in the country as to have spawned a whole new industry of just providing their effigies for countless fans to burn.
The Australians might take offence at such brazen Bucknor-bashing for it has long been suspected that the Jamaican football referee is a secret Aussie sympathiser.
Had he been doing duty in the last World Cup, the Socceroos would not have been felled by a foul penalty call in virtually the last minute that allowed the Italians to triumph while the yellow jerseys stood eliminated.
While the honourable duo of Benson & Bucknor have been given the honorary status of best Australian players, Ricky Ponting has been given the status of an honorary umpire and with it the best umpire award since he was the one who signaled Sourav Ganguly out caught by Clarke as if he were God pronouncing judgment on the Day of Reckoning.
One wonders whether Bucknor would have secretly applauded this index finger raising style of the skipper from slips even as Benson raised his finger in the manner of an undertaker confirming that God had decreed the dismissal sending the former Indian skipper packing to the pavilion.
Here, Ganguly should actually have been given the fair play award for in walking off so quietly there was a telling gesture to be felt in his thundering silence. In younger days, a more temperamental batsman may have risked being hauled up before the match referee by demonstrating dissent.
The sole nominee for the Oscar award for acting was Michael Clarke who in the course of one Test match went from prospective national vice-captain to an Ugly Aussie of the old school of 'hard as nails' Oz cricket.
There are very few batsmen in world cricket who could have looked so innocent after gloving a ball waist-high to first slip.
Standing in the crease for as long as it takes a Clint Eastwood to make an Oscar speech, Clarke trudged off with the air of injured innocence. Surely, creative Hol lywood directors would have put him down in their notebooks as a future star of the tinsel world.
Bollywood would also be well advised to consider a new starring role for him in Victory, the ultimate cricket movie recording how the world's best team wins some of its matches.
Andrew Symonds has been given the 'honesty' award for accepting that he had indeed nicked the ball over which decision there was such a shindig the noise off the bat is still ringing in the ears of followers of Indian cricket.
The snick made a noise so loud it may have carried across the Tasman while it also reverberated around the world thanks to the spread of satellite television and its universal live coverage.
This being a respected family newspaper, the SMSes regarding Harbhajan Singh's quotes aimed at Symonds cannot be repeated verbatim, but rest assured one of them is really funny and lends a possible reason why there was a clash of cultures that led to some monkey business being suspected by the Aussies.
A website quickly countered this emerging derogatory view of our simian friends by saying that we build temples to them where we worship them.
Why, we even believe they built a bridge, the now highly controversial Ram Sethu. There is also a reminder that Indians have even made movies about monkeys for instance, Kotigalu saar kotigalu (Monkeys, sir, monkeys) in Kannada, incidentally the mother tongue of our skipper Anil Kumble.
The skipper, with his rich knowledge of cricket history, hit back the hardest at the Aussies by using the highly emotional words of the Australian captain, Bill Woodfull, when he suggested that only one team out there was playing cricket.
Beaten black and blue by the excesses of the Bodyline series and lying on the massage table, the skipper of yore had made the mighty statement that said more about sportsmanship and gamesmanship in a few succinct words than many books.
Maybe, Kumble qualifies for an award for his inspired bon mot of the year that left the Aussies if not quite speechless at least dumbfounded for a while before machine-gunning their retaliatory fire at those historic words. Nothing they said, however, came close to snatching the award from Kumble who stood like a skipper on the burning deck, well into the penultimate over, which sadly for his team became the last. Surely, the Indian team deserved an award for equanimity in the face of grave adversity.
Republished with permission from The Asian Age
The Australians might take offence at such brazen Bucknor-bashing for it has long been suspected that the Jamaican football referee is a secret Aussie sympathiser.
Had he been doing duty in the last World Cup, the Socceroos would not have been felled by a foul penalty call in virtually the last minute that allowed the Italians to triumph while the yellow jerseys stood eliminated.
While the honourable duo of Benson & Bucknor have been given the honorary status of best Australian players, Ricky Ponting has been given the status of an honorary umpire and with it the best umpire award since he was the one who signaled Sourav Ganguly out caught by Clarke as if he were God pronouncing judgment on the Day of Reckoning.
One wonders whether Bucknor would have secretly applauded this index finger raising style of the skipper from slips even as Benson raised his finger in the manner of an undertaker confirming that God had decreed the dismissal sending the former Indian skipper packing to the pavilion.
Here, Ganguly should actually have been given the fair play award for in walking off so quietly there was a telling gesture to be felt in his thundering silence. In younger days, a more temperamental batsman may have risked being hauled up before the match referee by demonstrating dissent.
The sole nominee for the Oscar award for acting was Michael Clarke who in the course of one Test match went from prospective national vice-captain to an Ugly Aussie of the old school of 'hard as nails' Oz cricket.
There are very few batsmen in world cricket who could have looked so innocent after gloving a ball waist-high to first slip.
Standing in the crease for as long as it takes a Clint Eastwood to make an Oscar speech, Clarke trudged off with the air of injured innocence. Surely, creative Hol lywood directors would have put him down in their notebooks as a future star of the tinsel world.
Bollywood would also be well advised to consider a new starring role for him in Victory, the ultimate cricket movie recording how the world's best team wins some of its matches.
Andrew Symonds has been given the 'honesty' award for accepting that he had indeed nicked the ball over which decision there was such a shindig the noise off the bat is still ringing in the ears of followers of Indian cricket.
The snick made a noise so loud it may have carried across the Tasman while it also reverberated around the world thanks to the spread of satellite television and its universal live coverage.
This being a respected family newspaper, the SMSes regarding Harbhajan Singh's quotes aimed at Symonds cannot be repeated verbatim, but rest assured one of them is really funny and lends a possible reason why there was a clash of cultures that led to some monkey business being suspected by the Aussies.
A website quickly countered this emerging derogatory view of our simian friends by saying that we build temples to them where we worship them.
Why, we even believe they built a bridge, the now highly controversial Ram Sethu. There is also a reminder that Indians have even made movies about monkeys for instance, Kotigalu saar kotigalu (Monkeys, sir, monkeys) in Kannada, incidentally the mother tongue of our skipper Anil Kumble.
The skipper, with his rich knowledge of cricket history, hit back the hardest at the Aussies by using the highly emotional words of the Australian captain, Bill Woodfull, when he suggested that only one team out there was playing cricket.
Beaten black and blue by the excesses of the Bodyline series and lying on the massage table, the skipper of yore had made the mighty statement that said more about sportsmanship and gamesmanship in a few succinct words than many books.
Maybe, Kumble qualifies for an award for his inspired bon mot of the year that left the Aussies if not quite speechless at least dumbfounded for a while before machine-gunning their retaliatory fire at those historic words. Nothing they said, however, came close to snatching the award from Kumble who stood like a skipper on the burning deck, well into the penultimate over, which sadly for his team became the last. Surely, the Indian team deserved an award for equanimity in the face of grave adversity.
Republished with permission from The Asian Age
